Snip snap.

Whoever invented chocolate milk is a fucking genius and should be accepted into the “Fucking Genius Hall of Fame.”  And if there isn’t such a place, there should be.

Make it.

I command it.

Although, I’m not really sure if chocolate milk can be called an invention.  Can you invent food?

Regardless, I want to know the thought process behind the invention of food concoctions.  Simple ones.  Chocolate milk for example.  Was someone sitting there and was like, “Oh fuck! I spilled my chocolate syrup that I randomly carry around with me into my milk.  But wait! This is really good.”  Or was it more of a “Hey, chocolate is awesome, and milk isn’t too bad.  What if they had a love child?”

Now I’m wondering what mixes we are missing out on.  There are foods that are yet to be discovered that will grope your taste buds, in a good way!

Subtle change of topic.

The Internet has got to be one of the worst inventions ever.  Giving people like me the ability to openly discuss my opinions with the world.  That’s brilliant.  I guess the things I say aren’t as bad (or awkward) as others though, and for every second I spend writing this is one less second I’m watching some slut blow a goat for fifty bucks.  Or maybe that’s the beauty of the Internet.  Knowing that whatever you say or do, someone has said or done something a lot worse than that, and you can view it all in the safety of your own home sitting in your boxers at four in the morning, eating Doritos and watching cartoons.  Or YouTube.  Or midget porn.  Or girls having sex with animals.  Or guys having sex with animals.  Whichever you’re into, I won’t judge you. And even if I did, you could just say “shut the fuck up faggot, go kill yourself” and I couldn’t do anything about it other than respond with a “no u.”